It's about time...

And the End Draws Near...

2004-08-20T20:16:00.000-07:00

So...it's been an entire month since I've last posted...wonder how many people are actually still out there reading this? Why am I posting this now? I'm not sure...I think it's mostly for the sake of my own records...and I really don't want to be one of those people who have "hopped on the blogger band-wagon" (but I think it's already too late for that)

What has happened in this past month? I think mostly...studying...and now...it's all over. The MCAT's (Medical College Admissions Test) was on August the 14th. This is probably the most gruelling exam one will ever have to take in their life! I walked into the building at 8am Saturday morning, and walked out of there at 5pm...NO JOKE! Given...i had a 1 hour lunch and two 10 minute breaks...but that's still 8 hours of solid test writing! Needless to say...I was EXTREMELY drained after this.

Since then...I've probably been asked about a million and one times..."How'd it go"...and I want to thank all of you for showing so much that you care. The day before, i received so many phone calls and e-mails just wishing me the best of luck...It really helped to take my mind off of all the stress and just sit and appreciate all of your support...thanks to everyone out there!

So...how DID it go? As I have been telling most people...I think no matter what the result may be...good...bad...I know that I can be at peace with it. I felt that I have already given it my all. This time around (yeah this is my 2nd time taking this test)...I don't think I can say that I could have done better on any section. If the results come back and are still not good enough, then I know that it is no longer in my hands what my future holds.

To some people, this may be a scary thing to think...that one has no control over their own future. But I strongly believe that it is only when we let go of trying to control our own lives and our own paths and hand it over to someone more powerful and filled with more wisdom than we could ever imagine, only then can we fully experience our lives to its fullest potential.

A week left before we leave for MEXICO! I can't believe that this summer has passed by so quickly! But it has been a great one I must say! Had a "moment" the other day while chillin' with my boys from highschool...(yeah WoNg's PiZzA!!!!). We were just hangin' out, joking around and laughin' our heads off like the fools that we are. (Multiple Guy Syndrome as some may like to call it ;o) ) And then...one guy sorta just got quiet (it was his birthday) and he got all serious...and looked at each one of us. "Thanks for a great birthday guys...man...i'm so old!" and that was it. The rest of the room just fell silent, and for a moment there, my crew of buddies...the most goofball buncha guys you'll ever meet...looked like each had just seen a ghost (most likely...their own)

We're all just sittin' around probly 20, 21 years old...and here we were...suffering our first glimpse of Quarter Life Crisis. But I think that it was in this moment...that i realized how truly lucky i have been to have such a close group of friends. These guys have known me since highschool...we've been there for each other through all the heartaches, all the laughter, all the downs and all the highs...and I couldn't thank God enough for these brothers!

So if anyone else out there is going thru this same "Quarter Life Crisis"...just sit back...and take a look around at how many wonderful things you've had the opportunity to experience in your life so far...friends, family...love, joy, even pain and trials...and think..."we're only a quarter way there!" For me...that's lifted my spirits, any time i feel old, or feel as though the best is already gone by...I just trust that i'm only being narrow-minded...that the world has so much more that I have yet to explore...and if I just let it happen in His time, God will take me there when I'm ready.

So, in closing this massive monthly update I'd just like to say thanks to everyone out there who has been a part of my life so far. Thank you for bringing me joy, happiness and yes...I would even like to thank you for bringing me pain and trials. Thank you all for helping me to experience my life...

I guess until next time (hopefully not too much longer)...

God Bless!

~Alex

So What's New?

2004-07-16T15:09:00.000-07:00

Hey guys,

I guess it's been yet another couple of weeks since my last post...my apologies for that...I guess I just...haven't had much time over these past weeks to do much posting...not exactly sure what i've been doing with my time...but...mah well...on with the post.

The summer seems to be just flying by...very little time to reflect...very little time to prepare. Prepare for what you may ask? Well...come this fall term I will be entering into my last year here at the University of WATERLOO. Along with this great joy...there comes many worries and feelings of uncertainty.

I've lived in the quaint little city of Waterloo for the past 17 years of my life! Other than a very brief leave of absence (where I was working in Ottawa for 3 months) I have lived within a 5 kilometre radius for the entire time...as I enter my graduating year at UW...not only will I be graduating from this university...but the future requires that I will be "graduating" from my home town as well...

Drawing so close to the end of this chapter in my life, many trials and tests of patience have presented themselves. It seems at times that my feelings towards this event sit at complete opposite ends of a dichotomy: On one hand I'm extremely excited about moving on in life...starting something new...striving forward...BUT...at the same time...I'm scared out of my mind and want to stay a kid for the rest of my life...there really is no happy middle grounds when it comes to this issue for me.

Just the other day, my mom and I were having somewhat of a one-sided conversation (she was doing most of the talking)...she was mostly giving me "caring comments" (this is a term that i've started to use in replacement of "nagging")...and this was becoming quite frustrating to me...sooo...me being the WONDERFUL son that I am muttered under my breath: "Maybe I should just move out..." As you could guess, this did not go over so well.

Eventually, we were able to smooth things out, but not before I had a long battle with my good friend "Pride". I have asked many a times for patience and humility from God...and now I see that it is not going to be an easy path that lies ahead. Instead of just "magically" changing me, I see now that God places these challenges that I may grow slowly and steadily in His abounding grace.

This is what I mean by tests of patience. It is almost as if in this final year here in Waterloo...I am supposed to come to another level of appreciation for the blessings in my life. It has become more and more evident that I have just become somewhat complacent with my surroundings...and these brief stints, be it with parents, with friends...whatever...they are just reminders that I still have much to learn and a lot of room to grow before I might be ready to move on in my life.

So in closing...I'd like to ask you all for your prayers. Everybody knows that eventually, we reach a point in time when we must end one chapter of our lives and continue on with the rest of our journey. For me...that time is quickly approaching and although I'm not so sure I've got the "idea" ready for my next chapter yet, it is in these times that I am so thankful for all of your support and continual prayers.

God Bless "Y'all" (heheh...pickin' up some southern slang eh Dor?),

Alex

Blog Withdrawal

2004-07-04T00:12:00.000-07:00

Hey guys…it has been a while since I’ve posted my last entry…hmm…wow…almost going on 3 weeks now! Hmm…let’s see…ok I’ll do a recap of the past couple of weeks. I’ll go in reverse chrono order…so if you don’t wanna read the old stuff…juss stop reading…but…it’s REALLY interesting stuff…PROMISE…(heheh…yeah…no not really…I just like to write stuff down to remind myself of the what’s been going on…I hope it’s not too boring…but…again…I can’t PROMISE anything…heheh =P)

July 3rd – Sittin’ on my butt

Today was quite the uneventful day. I woke up around noon…played a bit of tennis…and pretty much studied the rest of the day. Had a lot of time to just…sorta…sit and think. Lots of stuff has been popping up here and there…nothing very coherent right now…not quite sure how to express it all…but I’m just going to jot down some ideas for my own personal records sake…so just bare with me guys…thanks.

Random Thoughts (may need clarification at a later date ;o) )
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- When friends get to know each other to a certain degree…what happens with that? If you drop away a little bit, does that make either of you a horrible friend? Or does it just mean times may be changing and along with that…the individuals in the relationship?

I strongly believe that as friends, you never should come to expect anything from the other person. I know EVERYONE says that…but how true is it when it comes to practice? I know that I for one am guilty of setting expectations… even (or maybe “especially” is a better word choice) especially when it comes to friends that I know have always and will always be there. Most of the time it is not even a conscious decision to put these expectations in place, they just…sort of…develop on their own.

I hope that I can learn to grow on a multitude of levels as a friend…firstly…I hope to be able to lessen my expectations of others. Not in a bitter or cynical sense, but rather I would like to be able to take on a liberating and gracious attitude when I view my friendships.

Secondly, although I don’t believe that friends should have expectations for each other…I would like to be able to set and exceed expectations of my own as well as those of others when I am “being a friend”…it seems in these past couple of weeks…issues have arisen that have caused some of my closest friends to feel as though I am no longer the same person anymore. That I cannot be counted on, and that I haven’t been there for them.

In my own eyes…I have done no wrong…but seriously now…when does anything ever look wrong from one’s own perspective of themselves? To those whom I’ve wronged…I believe you know who you are…I apologize. At first…my mentaility was that of pride and self-centredness…I didn’t think I had done anything wrong…and so I just ignored…and even got annoyed at your comments of my “short comings” as a friend.

But now I realize that in doing so…I have committed the worst crime of all…not caring. When the issues at hand were brought up…automatically, my defences went up and I just blocked it all out…started telling myself that I was right and you were wrong…now don’t get me wrong…there are still areas that I hold to and don’t believe I should have to step down on…but…for me to just give up and stop caring…THAT…I am sorry for.

I don’t even know if you’ll get a chance to read this…I don’t know if you care anymore…but I guess…this is just for me…a reminder…of what I’m aiming to do. If you read this…and can find it in your heart…please keep me in your prayers…as I know that I cannot get over my own pride without some help from Above. Thanks…for everything…

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July 2nd – Happy Birthday XIO!

It was Xiomara’s (pronounced show-mar-a  hhehhe…sorry xio…you don’t want people walkin’ around calling you “CHA” mara do you? Heheh…oh that media class…what memories!) Birthday today…and Cynthia (her best friend since “THIRD GRADE”…sorry no…actually since highschool…but if you’ve seen that Clean and Clear Daily Pore Cleanser commercial…and know that I love Kristin Kreuk…then… yeah…forgive me ;o) ) Cynthia was going to be coming in from Toronto as a surprise.

It was actually quite a confusion at first…but we managed to figure things all out in the end. I found out from Xio’s mom that Cynth was gonna surprise Xio. I told a couple of our friends that Cynth was coming into town…but I may have forgotten to mention that it was a surprise…

I get a frantic call from a buddy a couple hours before Cynthia was to be in town and was told that apparently Xiomara knew already and I was the source of the spill!! I was a little bit freaked out at this point…I tend to let things slip every once in a while but I was SURE I hadn’t spoken with xio at all that day…BUT…the other people I had told…did THEY know it was a surprise!? OH NO!!

After about a half hour of frantically trying to figure out who had been the source of this security breach…I gave up…a little disappointed with myself and with whoever had supposedly spilled the beans.

The time rolls around to when Cynthia should’ve been arriving…but no sign of her yet…hmmmm…so those of us who were in town decided to invite xiomara over for a bit of Texas Hold ‘em and maybe some BBT after…JUST as we get off the phone with Xio…cynthia calls and tells us she’s 5 minutes away from xio’s house! BUT…XIO was going to be on her way over to MY house!...uh oh…

Without thinking very clearly…I rushed to call xio to tell her not to come over yet…but right as I finished dialing…I realized that I hadn’t thought of a REASON why she shouldn’t come over…did she know Cynthia was coming or not?! Would she figure it out if we said she shouldn’t come over?! AHHhhhh!! Such confusion…such tension…such pressure! And what did I do when all of that pressure was on me…heheh…I passed the phone over to Dan…and let him handle it..

LUCKILY…he’s a much quicker thinker than I am…and was able to save the day with

“Oh…Alex’s parents just…uhh…came home and they’re…yeah…uhm…kicking us out now…so…we’ll come over to your house…k…bye!”

HAHAH!! Smooth dan! Seriously! I couldn’t have put it any better myself! The rest of the night went pretty calmly…we ended up going to Rev and then “May-el’s” (do you GET it yet Cynthia? Haha!) for some breakfast. All in all…a good nite…minus the confusion and “chaos” in preserving the surprise…heheh…HAPPY BIRTHDAY Xio!!

July 1st – KaBlAMMM!! Canada Day!

What better day to kick off the Counrty’s birthday than with a good ol’ fashioned game of STICK-BALL…Wong’s Pizza style (If ya don’t know…*cough*…don’t ask…heheh)!!! I got together just a bit after lunch with a whole crew of my close highschool buddies and we had a SUHWEET game of “Stickball”. Now…you may THINK that you know what playing sports with friends is all about…but no no…there has never before been seen, the likes of this caliber of sheer athleticism, competition and true comradery in a sport before!!

Hahah! Actually…Stickball is just a game that some of the guys made up with literally…a stick…and a ball…oh yeah…and a make-shift field (actually a tennis court). As low-budget as it may sound…this is probably one of our most valued past times…it was great just being able to chill and hang out with these friends again…really brought back some great memories!

To think it seems like just yesterday that we were all sittin’ around on our spares in the caf…without a care in the world…no thought about the “future”…no worries about where life was taking us next…now…it seems all too quickly… “the boys” have been forced to grow up.

A couple of us are entering our graduating year…making this our final “summer” so to speak before we enter the REAL WORLD! For others…school doesn’t seem to be making much sense at this point with other worries that are taking priority in their lives…I guess it’s nice to know…that for that brief moment…when we’re together playing Stickball…we can hold on to what element of our “youthful days” we still have left. HAHAH! Depressed yet? Come on…seriously now…if you really knew us bunch of guys…you’d know that…well…we’re NEVER GONNA GROW UP! WOOOoooOOOT!! Hahah (Wong’s for life!)

Week of June 21st – June 25th – UWCCF Coffeehouse: “He Is…”

This week really just sort of melted into one giant…NEVER-ENDING cycle. Here’s how every day would proceed…I would be up the night (or rather morning) before until around…4…5…sometimes 6 in the morning preparing the skit for the Coffeehouse that happened on Friday (25th). The reason this had to be done…lack of foresight and planning for this entire venue.

Even with the lack of planning and preparation…SOMEHOW, God was able to pull this entire event together! Heck…the script was not 100% completed until the NIGHT BEFORE at around…4:30am!! And even then…we weren’t able to go through the entire thing. We pretty much went through the script once fully through only with about…20 minutes ‘til “show time”.

In the end though I guess it was never really up to our own efforts that this would have turned out the way it did. These large events never are. With things like Lifesong in the fall and winter, and pretty much anything else that requires a lot of planning, as a whole…the asian community is not very effective at planning ahead and staying on time (hence the 5th dimension of “Chinese Time”). But somehow…EVERY time…things just happen to fall into place.

It’s times like these…that you truly know the full extent of how God is able to work in the most desperate of situations…although I’m pretty sure He doesn’t really WANT us to be rushed, unorganized and unprepared ALL of the time…He definitely shows us that it is in these times where we need to trust Him the most!

I am really impressed with the devotion and effort that all of the people helping out displayed. To all of you out there…thank you so much!

A few friends from my small group at Campus Challenge also came down for the Coffeehouse and it was just an amazing time of chillin’…eating…and washing dishes (hahah! Jason! =P)

JUNE 18th – My 21st Birthday

Well…this was an interesting night to say the least. I was quickly reminded how weak I really am when it comes to resisting certain temptations when given the opportunity. I was out with several of my close friends…and we just ended up havin’ a couple drinks in one of my buddy’s basements…about 5 of us in all. One thing (rather one drink) lead to another…and by the time I woke up in the morning…about 80% of the night was completely absent from my memory.

I’m not saying this to prove any point here. I am neither condemning NOR condoning drinking. Rather…I am just sharing how my experience from this night…reminded me of certain acts of faithfulness to which we should keep constantly on our hearts.

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body” ~1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (Thanks Dan…)

Not only did I destroy my body with this excessive amount of alcohol, I put myself at risk of lowered inhibitions and impure tendencies. Luckily I was in the presence of only my closest friends whom I could trust to take care of me.

I’m not sure how many of you will respond to this post, but if you have anything you’d like to ask…any comments…I would be more than pleased to make an attempt to clarify.

So…that’s the end of THAT massive posting…I hope to be keeping more up to date in the future…I’ve got a couple more interesting stories about my trips down to OASIS…and…well…although I haven’t heard from Richard in a while now…I can only keep praying that things have worked out for him, and if anything new comes up…I’ll be sure to let you all know!

‘til next time...in the words of a great intellect of our time… “Be Cool!”~C.Tsoi (Yeah baby! Hahah!)

Ahh yes...MORE about the parents...

2004-06-16T21:30:00.000-07:00

This post is just an update on this past week's events...mostly I'd like to make mention of what happened with my my parents being back home. I think it was truly a blessing that I've had this time away from them...so that I may be challenged on a whole new level upon their return. A couple of things happened...

The first thing, as I had previously mentioned, was that from certain comments that my parents had made, I was starting to get discouraged about my ministries of helping those who are less fortunate. I started to run through all of the shortcomings of Richard and was getting more and more discouraged. But I had a talk with a brother...and he told me that often times in these types of ministries, we will not see the fruits of our labours.

So I realized that my attitude was still not right. I guess I was serving and helping Richard because I wanted to see something change. I wanted to see him be able to help himself. But rather...my attitude should have been wanting to serve him for the sake of showing him compassion. I would assume these people don't very often get compassion from others...and to be able to give that to them should be reward enough...

I'm working on that...and praying about it...I'm glad that my parents were able to stir up these feelings inside of me (albeit unintentionally) so now I am more aware of my intentions.

The next thing that happened with my parents (this was just on tuesday) was I got into somehwat of an outrageous argument with my mom...and my DAD of all people was on MY side! The argument was outrageous not because of its magnitude...but rather the content was outrageous.

She was "nagging" at me about cleaning my room and doing my laundry. seriously...that was pretty much what started it...then it developed into my mom saying: "How come I can NEVER communicate with you anymore...why are things so difficult now?"

Then me replying: "Maybe if ALL of our conversations didn't end with YOU nagging me to DO something...THEN we'd be able to have a decent conversation!"

heheh...*blush* as you can see...I didn't handle that situation too well...

and my Dad saying: "Just leave him alone. It's the summer he just wants to relax!"

GO DAD! heheh...no no...i felt terrible. Cuz I KNEW that since my parents got back I had been getting lazier and lazier...and it was already frustrating enough on my own...without my mom having to point it out.

Eventually...we were able to sort things out...I ended up storming out of the restaurant (where the argument was occuring) and going home to clean my room and do my laundry (like a good boy! haha =P) my mom called me at home and at that point I knew things were ok.

The most amazing part of it was that later on that evening, I was finally able to sit down and have an amazing conversation with my mom about their trip to Taiwan. She shared with me something that I had been praying about for a LONG while now...My Grandparents have accepted Christ! AMEN!!

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"--which is the first commandment with a promise-- "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."~Ephesians 6:1-3

So all in all, it was a pretty eventful week...oh yeah...one LAST thing about my parents...I PROMISE...they're coming to MEXICO with me at the end of August! Now THIS...I am VERY excited about! NO JOKE!! heheh...

'til next time...you all take care ;o)

Parents are home...hmmm...

2004-06-11T11:11:00.000-07:00

So yeah...parents are back home now...independence...gone...quiet time...slowly diminishing...sense of responsibility...completely non-existent...yup...things are back to the way they were before =/

Kind of a weird thing happened on the car ride home from the airport...I started talkin' to my parents about "the future" (haha! don't you just love those "talks"?) and it was...to say the least...discouraging. let me explain...

First thing was...I started telling them that i was thinking of travelling to China if i didn't get into med school this year. sort of take a year off school, and see what kind of needs there were in China...help out at health facilities, get an idea of thier situation...that kind of thing...and their response?

"China is dangerous...you should think of teaching english in Taiwan. People in China...you can't trust them...they'll try to trick you...and your chinese isn't that great...no...we don't think that'd be such a great idea...you wouldn't be able to handle yourself over there, it's very different."

hmm...ok...at this point i'm biting my tongue and just trying to at least hear their reasons...but they just sort of went on about all of the bad stuff that was going on there and the bad stories...etc etc...

ok...so that was number one...THEN...we somehow got onto the topic of Richard. and to sum it up in a nutshell...my dad pretty much said "those people are all the same...you can try and help them...but they don't want to help themselves..."

and what upset me the most wasn't that he said this...cuz he's said it before and it never got to me...i guess what bothered me the most...was...that a part of me...believed it to be true! I started to think of the "shortcomings" of Richard...and it has been nagging away at me ever since!

I don't know what this is...is this a test of my faith? another attitude check from above? i'm really not sure...

so that was that. I'm not sure where i'm going with this...please do not get the wrong impression of my parents...i know that everything they have said was out of love and concern for me. They are not tyrants that do not want to help the poor or those in China
but i think i just need to really think about what they've said...and more importantly how that has had an effect on my passion for what i am doing.

Thanks again for listening you guys...whoever may be out there...heheh..it just helps to write it all down...take care...and God Bless!

Strawberry Milkshake Anyone??

2004-06-08T23:58:00.000-07:00

Just a quick note before I head off to bed. I took a shift of work tonite for the waitress...somewhat begrudgingly. I had an essay that I have yet to get started on and tonite was supposed to be my night to work on it. Alas, I ended up working...and I definitely think that it was in His plan...once again!

Ran into Richard again...well actually he stopped in at the restaurant. I hadn't seen him in about...a week or so and I was quite surprised to see him again! Just out of SHEER coincidence...our usual dishwasher had finished his last shift on friday...and as of Monday, I would have been the official dishwasher. God really does work in myseterious ways...i mean...seriously...who woulda thought that Rich would show up at such a PERFECT time!

So he comes in...but this time...he's got other plans. He tells me he needs my help to figure out a RESUME!!! You don't know HOW happy I was when I heard what he told me next...he had been out and about in the Fairview mall area (in kitchener) and talked to the manager/owner at the Molly Bloom's out there. The manager (Sam was his name...he even got a business card!!) asked Richard to create a resume and fax it to him ASAP!!

So we worked on that all nite...and at the end of that, Rich was able to help me with the dishes and I was able to help him with a meal and some cash. We said our goodbyes after enjoying a nice meal and excellent conversation together (He's a TOTAL joker by the way! it's so jokes juss chattin' with him! =) )and I asked him if he could come back tomorrow nite for the dishes again. I'll be seeing him again at 8:45pm inside Grand China ;o)

Funny thing was...when he left...I told him I was gonna stick around the restaurant and just study for a couple hours (MCAT FUN-NESS!!) and he was cool with that. Here comes the really amazing part...not more than 45 minutes later...he comes back knockin' on the restaurant door...as I approach to open the door for him, i see a BUCKET of STRAWBERRY ICE CREAM in his hands!

"LET'S MAKE SHAKES!!!" he said with a child like sense of excitement!! I asked him what he was doing and he was just like:

"Well i figured i wouldn't get enough money to crash at the House of friendship tonite,aaand...I was hot...so i bought some ice cream! When i realized how MUCh there was..i thought of you...sittin' here writin' that stupid test and thought you might want to have some too! now...you got any MILK?!"

The next half hour was spent digging up any and ALL the ingredients we could think of to make this shake the SUPER SHAKE! and BOY was it ever the SUPER SHAKE!! *droool* Started with Strawberry shortcake ice-cream...added some fresh mangos...a bit of crushed ice cubes...chocolate syrup...and to top it all off...some sweet sweet Fortune COOKIE CRUMBLES...*DROOOOL*

so that was that...a night where i could've just sat at home...writing my essay...I ended up sharing an AMAZING shake...with an even more amazing guy...thanks Rich!

Oasis

2004-06-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

Wow...ok so tonite was our first nite at Oasis. This was truly an amazing experience!! I mean...heck...i've been serving people food for more than 7 or 8 years now...grew up in a restaurant...and never before have I felt so satisfied in providing food for someone who needs it so much...and is SO appreciative of it!

I am really looking forward to going back there over the rest of this term to serve the people there and hopefully get to build up a relationship with a few of them. Thanks Dor for com'n out! and this being your first day of summer...hope you had a good time. Abs...sorry I missed tennis buddy...but I know that you understand ( I know I shoulda called...i'm an arse...sorry...i'll make it up to you with some General Tso's chicken...how's that sound ;o) )

soo...2 blogs in one day eh? is something on my mind? i'm not quite sure...but i'd just like to share a few verses that have been floatin' around in my head these past couple of days...no real theme (not yet at least)...so i hope you guys can benefit from these...and maybe help me figure out some sort of tying element?? ;o) For those of you who'd like to skip this part...i'll mark it off.

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"Brace yourself like a man;
I will question you,
and you shall answer me."
~Job 38:3

"In your anger do not sin;
when you are on your beds,
search your hearts and be silent."
~Psalm 4:3

" I will exalt you, O Lord,
for you lifted me out of the depths
and did not let my enemies gloat over me."
~Psalm 30:1

"My son, if you accept my words
and store up my commands within you,
then you will understand the fear of the LORD
and find the knowledge of God.
Then you will understand what is right and just
and fair-every good path.
For wisdom will enter your heart,
and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.
Discretion will protect you,
and understanding will guard you."
~Proverbs 2:1, 5, 9-11

"Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness."
~Phillipians 2:5-7

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Thanks fer listenin' to my ramble again guys...and if you have any questions...comments...whatever...feel free to post a comment or even e-mail me...i'm always happy to hear what you guys may have to share...thanks! take care all =)

Alex (acwang@uwaterloo.ca

Macaulay Culkin = Alex Wang???

2004-06-07T08:15:00.000-07:00

Hey all!

Just givin' you an update on the situation here in the big lonely house, going on ONE WHOLE WEEK now!! For those of you who didn't know, my parents went to Taiwan for my gramma's 85th birthday and my bro's wedding reception and I've been deserted (heheheh) here in Waterloo to take care of my li'l sis! (Mistral's actually our 7-yr old "puppy")

When they first left, I felt kind of overwhelmed. I had to make sure the house was safe...lock up...feed Missy...take care of the restaurant stuff...and handle all of my own work such as classes and volunteer. I didn't know HOW my parents handled ALL of the stuff that they did and I think it's really brought me to a new level of appreciation of what they do for me.

What I've come to realize...is that my tendency to be lazy and irresponsible around the house can be COMPLETELY blamed on their presence! (hahah!) But seriously...when they are around, the house is a mess, my room's a disaster, I don't take care of Missy, and I don't cook for myself...All I do is study...IF that! But over this past week...I guess I have HAD to adjust (for fear of an infestation of rodents if I didn't clean up after myself) and I am HOPING that this attitude can continue on even after they return (but unfortunately...it is most likely that things will return to the way they were before...)

Something else that I would definitely encourage everyone to take advantage of (if ever in this Macaulay Culkin-esque situation of being left Home Alone)...Quiet time. The first few days I was going mad with isolation! I constantly had to be chatting on msn or out and about doing something with someONE otherwise I'd feel weird alone at home. But eventually...I came to really cherish that quiet alone time. Just to do whatever...devos, prayer, sleep, movies etc etc. It is really just a nice time to collect your thoughts and refocus yourself.

Well...that was quite the monster blog...about nothing...so I'll be off now hope you are all doing well in whatever it is that you are doing...;o)

In Him,

Alex

Richard...(Part 2)

2004-06-01T08:35:00.000-07:00

This is going to be a bit disjointed from my last posting (as I said I would be continuing my thoughts from last day in this post), but something really amazing happened just yesterday (Monday May 31st). I was working the dinner shift at the restaurant and it was fairly busy. And guess who happens to walk in...you got it! Richard (the gentleman that I had met on Friday nite).

At first I was a bit worried. Again it was my selfish nature thinking negative thoughts. "Is he going to bother the customers? Does he want food again? why is he here?"

But thank goodness I have had all of your support in this matter...and God was able to work a miracle through this situation! After a while of talking, Richard told me that he was freezing cold and needed a place to stay for the nite. There is a shelter in Downtown kitchener and he said that it would cost him $11.90 to stay there for the night (he was pretty precise with that number).

The thing that struck me tonite again..was that he didn't just ask for money for no reason...it was so he could stay at The House of Friendship (the shelter)...AND...he even offered to work for it! He told me that he'd be willing to do dishes, take out garbage, mop..etc etc.

At first i was reluctant to let him do so for the fear of making the other employees uncomfortable (also when the actual dishwasher/clean up guy came by...he wouldn't have anything to do).

But again Richard's sincerity got to me. After i told him my dilemma about the other employees, he looked at me and told me that he really needed this. If i could just give him some work so that he could earn even half of the nite's fee he would be ever so thankful. The fact that he was so willing to work for his money...I couldn't turn this man away.

Turns out, he was an AMAZING worker!! As i was saying...it was a relatively busy nite at the restaurant...but he just blew through the dishes in a flash! after that, i asked him to take out the garbage in the kitchen and he even took the initiative to ask if there were any other garbage cans that he could empty out as well! (heck! I don't even think of that when i take out the trash!!)

Finally...when the nite almost came to an end...i was able to sit down and share a meal with him. Friends...i'd like to take this time now to introduce you to Richard (shoot...i didn't get his last name yet):

He's a 34 year old man living on the streets of Kitchener.

He was born and raised in this city and both his mother AND grandmother live in this area as well.

He has been unemployed and out of a residence for almost a year and a half now, and his last stable employment was at a meat packing factory behind Conestoga Mall.

He has two children. Two beautiful daughters ages 18 and 6. Although his 18 year old has dropped out of school and is currently working, he has high hopes for his 6 year old (who is currently living in sudbury with her mother)

He loves sports of all kinds...the Toronto Maple Leafs are his team...buuuut...he figures Calgary will do for the time being ;o)

After our meal, he was on his way. I realized that he would be most likely walking downtown or taking the bus (which would've cost him another $2)...and as "luck" would have it, for some reason...I just happened to have a bus ticket lying around the restaurant! Luck? Chance? Some forgetful student who's walking home now cuz he/she's missing a bus ticket? I can't quite say. All i know is that that nite...things happened the way the did for a reason...we'll see what happens from here on in =)

Richard...how blind am I? Please Forgive me...

2004-05-30T01:06:00.000-07:00

God has some interesting ways of piecing our lives together..

Just within these past couple of days...it's been like a puzzle almost, pieces just keep falling into place and a bigger picture is slowly developing. Starting with last nite (Friday night)...

I had just come from our CCF program where Dr. Wong gave a presentation on Christian Scholarship. He left off with a strong message of "our time here on campus is for a greater ministry later in life". As I was walking to the restaurant to close up for the night...I couldn't help but wonder...

"If i'm going to be in school for another 6-8 years...when is my 'BIGGER' ministry going to be on it's way?"

As I walked into the restaurant...I saw a rather raggedy looking man walking around the parking lot. I made a mental note of him, and made an extra effort to lock the door behind me. As I closed the till for the night, I saw him walking around outside...and he even tried to open the door to the restaurant!

At this point I said to myself "Ok, when I leave here tonite...he's going to ask me for something...no matter what, just say you don't have anything...and be on your way". I was set on doing this...until something happened that made me realize my err.

I finished closing up the store and...I'm almost ashamed to share what I did next...I turned off the lights and went to the window to scan the parking lot to see if the man was around. When I thought the coast was clear...I made a dash for it.

Needless to say...I don't think that this is what God wanted to happen that nite. As soon as I got in my car and turned it on, the man was by my window side. The whole night something about this man rung a bell in my head. He looked familiar to me, and I thought I recognized him from a previous encounter. So there he stood..at my window. I rolled it down...and he asked me, not for money...but for food!

"BINGO!" I thought to myself...I figured this was the same guy that had very RUDELY asked me for food one time outside of Mel's (K if you remember that day...)and I smugly replied:

"sir, I remember offering you food one time outside of mel's, I'm not sure if you remember...but you were quite rude to me. So I don't think I'm going to be able to help you out tonite."

I made this assumption that HE was the same guy as before, not so much based upon my recognition of this man...but rather...on a preformed bias that I already had against him: dirty clothes...not so well kept...asking for food...he must be the same guy!

what happened next...absolutely blew me out of the water. This man, with the most sincere expression said to me:

"I am sorry for that other gentleman's behaviour, but I assure you that I would never be so rude if someone was to offer me food. I'm just a man hard on my luck, looking for a solid meal tonite, if you could help me out."

At this point...I realized the horrible mistake in the assumption that I had made. This WAS NOT the same man. But being the ignorant fool that I was...sitting all High and mighty...I failed to distinguish this man...from any other person of these sorts that I have come across in my days.

In my guilt and complete disgust with myself...I offered the man part of my own dinner...hoping that it could make up for the insult I had incurred. He was more than grateful for the food I gave him and quite understanding of my mistaken assumption. Still...I do not think that this man...Richard...deserved the label and prejudice which I bestowed upon him.

Which brings me back to the puzzle...after this incident...I didn't know what to expect anymore from the training at Oasis (which was going to be the next morning). How could I go into a youth drop-in centre/soup-kitchen...and say I have a heart to serve these people, when my actions on a daily basis do not reflect it? As always...if you ask Him...He will give it to you...

That night...I asked for forgiveness twice for the way I treated Richard. First from Richard who was completelyok with it...he just shrugged it off and said he got it all the time...my second plea for forgiveness...was from my Father.

I was ashamed of what I had done that night...uncertain about my own intentions for wanting to serve at Oasis. Finally...in seeking forgiveness from God...I was able to find so much more...(getting late now...so i'll continue this tomorrow)

Listening...

2004-05-28T00:20:00.000-07:00

Had an interesting experience tonite...and somewhat of a "revelation". I just got a chance to talk to some friends...and...well...just listen to them. I don't think that I had much to say to them per se...but in the end...they seemed to be a bit more at ease. After listening to them...I also felt like I knew them a bit better...and trusted them a bit more for sharing with me.

Makes me wonder at the power of just listening to someone. Such a simple task...some would say you're not really DOING anything for them...but I know that for me at least, at times when there really isn't anything anyone can do for me, having them there to listen to me is the best thing I could ever ask for!

And you know what? It puts me at peace inside to think...to know...that I have someone in my life who will always be there...just to listen. No matter how much I have to say...no matter how arbritrary it may seem...my Father is there to listen.

And I also know that when the time is come...He will require the same of me...to just listen...I wonder if I'm ready to truly hear what He has to say...

Patience...pshaww...who needs it!

2004-05-27T15:53:00.000-07:00

Campus Challenge (CC) 2004 just happened over this May 2-4 long weekend. God really showed me something that I REALLY need to work in my life...although it was not necessarily a new concept to me, but to have it come at this point in my life was as eye opening as it could ever have been.

This "something" is my patience. When it comes to other people I am USUALLY pretty patient. But when it comes down to being patient with myself or even worse...with God...my fuse is REMARKABLY short!

"Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near."
~James 5:7,8

At CC this year, there was a time of silent prayer as is the case most years, where we just take some "alone" time with God...to pray...listen..to just BE with Him. But I couldn't be happy with this alone time...I wanted more out of it. Rather...I EXPECTED more out it and when I didn't get that...i got frustrated and upset!

I couldn't even sit still for 40 minutes in His presence...just...being at peace...being still...being patient! I look at it now...and i realize that there are many areas of my life where, if I had a little more patience...maybe situations would have been handled better.

So i guess there is no time like the present to try something new...being patient with myself and with God. I'm not sure exactly how I'm to go abouts obtaining this "patience" thing...but one thing's for sure...i better be prepared to wait a long time for it to come! =P

So if I could ask you guys to pray fer me..that'd be kix...thanx!

I dunno how this whole blog thing works...so i'm gonna end it here...i've got quite a bit to say...but...yeah...not sure how much is too much...so i'll just blog some other time. Take care you guys...'til next time...

Here we Go....

2004-05-20T14:37:00.000-07:00

Well...here it is...Alex Wang's official first blog! I never thought that I would be doing this...but...i've come to notice that I have been sharing a lot of the same things with many people...and this way, although i won't be cutting down on my sharing with people, at least if i DO ferget anyone...they can have a reference to the stuff goin' on in my life.

Hope you all enjoy this...and feel free to post any comments you may have about the posts as well...makes me feel special..hahah!

Talk to you soon!